The charter.

The document

The paMuhacha charter

We come here for marriage, and we agree to be honest, to respect the aunt's role, and not to waste each other's time. In detail:

For everyone All three sign

1. I am here to marry or to help others marry - not to pass time.
2. Everything I tell the aunt is true: my status, my faith, my people, my household.
3. I respect the aunt's role. The asking, the pacing and the introduction are hers to guide.
4. I will not waste anyone's time, and I accept that time-wasting ends my place here.
5. I will treat the other person with dignity, whatever the outcome.
6. I will not bring drama to my suitor - no scenes, no third parties, no old business carried into a new house.
7. I am willing to sit for counselling as and when it is needed, before or after the introduction.
8. I will take the personality test, and I agree that my result is shared with my aunt so she can guide the pair of us properly.

To the man The man signs

1. I will be plain about what I am looking for, and honest about what I can offer a household.
2. I will not string anyone along, and I will let the aunt know when I am serious and when I am not.
3. I am the one who chooses, so I am the one who pays: R100 for each introduction, due when the introduction is made. It buys the asking, the sit-down and the introduction - never a match. A match cannot be sold.

To the woman The woman signs

1. I will say honestly what I want in a husband - including a man who can take care of a home - and I will not be made to apologise for it.
2. I will be truthful about myself, and I will not waste a serious man's time.

To the aunt The aunt signs

1. I will take each background with care and keep what is private, private.
2. I will judge honestly, guard both people's time, and stay through the settling.
3. I will never trade on what I am told, and I will hold income and assets in confidence until the right moment.
4. I will ask about temperament - how a person carries themselves when they are angry - because no form can ask it, and I will say plainly to the other side what I found.

On money How fees work

1. Entering is free. No one is charged before an aunt has sat with them.
2. A small introduction fee is charged when the aunt makes an introduction. It is paid by the man, who is the one choosing. The woman is never charged.
3. The fee buys the asking, the sit-down and the introduction. It never buys a match - a match cannot be sold.
4. The aunt is paid a share of every introduction fee for the work she did, agreed with her in writing when she is taken on. She is paid on the introduction, never on a match, because a match cannot be sold.

I understand - begin